The Admin Office
By Anson Eggerss
If you have spent any time in the Rhetoric Admin office, it does not take long to see that all office stereotypes exist in every situation. In fact, our very own Anson Eggerss has written a screenplay for what a typical day might look like. Imagine....
Royal Brown- Pam Morgan Brown- Jim Mary Clifford- Angela
Rob Shelton- Michael Dodd Naiser- Creed Shelly Ward- Oscar
Shawn Harrild- Daryll Paul Johnson- Stanley Ben Vis- Andy
Curby Graham- Dwight Cody Daniels and Travis Cox- Pete and Clark
FADE IN: INT. ADMINISTRATION BUILDING – DAY
The sounds of ringing phones and shuffling papers echo throughout the Admin on Monday morning.
MR. BROWN (Pam) does his daily receptionist routine as he answers calls and handles visitors and students that walk through the door. While MRS. BROWN (Jim) enters to drop off her husband’s lunch
MRS. BROWN (Jim): Have a great day honey!
PAUL JOHNSON (Stanley): (reading his 'zine) Here we are again. I hate Mondays.
MRS. CLIFFORD (Angela): (bursts through the door) Sorry I’m late, Felix and Whiskers got into a fight this morning and I had to put them in timeout.
Mrs. WARD (Oscar): (sarcastically) That’s fantastic!
MR. SHELTON (Michael) (enters and exclaims): Everyone. Conference room. Now!
MR. VIS (Andy): (singing) Ruh da doot to doo! Alright boss! Let’s get our hard working bottoms up and at it people.
Just then, MR. GRAHAM (Dwight) enters through the front door and immediately attempts to take control of the situation.
MR. GRAHAM (Dwight): Quiet Benjamin! Alright everyone, we are quite deficient in many areas…
Before MR. GRAHAM can finish his sentence MR. SHELTON (Michael) interrupts him.
MR. SHELTON (Michael): Curby! I haven’t even received the list of at-risk reports yet!
MR. GRAHAM (Dwight): FALSE. At-risk reports are actually the faculty’s way of saying that the students are doing a good job academically, because if one is at-risk, one is closer to finding foreknowledge than obtaining the intellectual ideas of the past.
MR. NAISER (Creed): (suddenly interjects) Well back when I was in the navy, at-risk reports were the norm.
MR. SHELTON (Michael) frowns, and MR. HARRILD (Darryl) addresses him as he points towards CODY DANIELS (Pete) and TRAVIS COX (Clark).
MR. HARRILD (Darryl): Hey Rob. Those two over there—aren’t they a little too young to be on our staff?
MR. SHELTON (Michael): Eh, corporate told me they had a golf cart so I figured, why not? Anyways, this meeting is dismissed…back to work people.
Photo by Taylor Tippit